1) Focus on the here and now: We should not keep an arsenal of past situations not expressed and at the slightest failure of the other to tell them. You have to express the feelings of the present moment, not face problems that happened, resentments are not good.
2) Try to answer why you are angry: Alomejor what has made you angry is not the subject of discussion or your partner has nothing to do with your anger.
3) Pay attention: Listening to the other is essential. When we pay attention with our whole body and mainly with our mind, our partner feels welcome and safe.
4) Everyone has their opinion about something or someone : Try to impose an idea, means not respecting the criterion of the other person. Each one believes that he is right, from where he is seeing him.
5) Always be kind and respectful: Even if it is about to explode, remember at all times that you are talking to "our partner", who is loved, who is loved above all things. Therefore deserves to be treated with love and respect.
6) The couple is not a fortune-teller: An example is to think that the other has to know our innermost desires. While the other may realize certain things, is not a wizard just to know us, therefore do not get angry and tell what you like or would like to do
7) Before speaking breathe and let talk to your partner: You have to stay calm and breathe before expressing yourself so as not to say words that can hurt the other. And let the couple tell you their version of events.
8) Do not focus on your partner's negative: At times when you are more upset, try to remember the virtues of the other, for more it costs you Look for those aspects that made you fall in love with your partner, magnify them, revive them in your mind. Focus on what you can do to improve the situation.
9) Commit to solve the problems: Accumulate the problems of couples and resolve them as they appear, allowing fluidity and harmony in the relationship . The ideal is to solve them as much as possible so that they do not become of the past.
10) Choose the right moment to resolve the conflict : It is important, because if not all you will get is that you do not pay attention . The worst moment is when the tension is about to explode, or when you are most romantic and you happen to talk about a conflict of the past.
11) Do not complain about our partner in front of other people: Intimate space that is built in a couple relationship is necessary to preserve it. Criticizing our partner or telling intimate situations to a third party opens a breach in trust and loyalty. What you do when you complain about your partner is to victimize you and others lose respect.
12) Do not ask for what you can not give: Maybe we should think about whether we are in a position to demand something like that to the other person or if it is preferable, for the good of both, to overlook small details that in our case have also been overlooked.
13) Negotiate ways to solve the couple's problems: Establish the consensus guidelines that suit you best to resolve situations that may be conflicting for you.
One d iscussion can not be won, only lose . Recall that many people have won arguments, but in return, they have lost their partners.